If you read my last two posts, you will see a progression of some beautiful awakenings and ah-has that have been shown to me throughout the last month or so. I feel to share these with you to inspire you too!
For a few days after my last experience, I began to feel a disconnect within me. I realized that there was a part of me that just could not really appreciate the amazing life I have and what I have been able to manifest in my life.
I have the most wonderful and loving man as my husband of over 21 years, have amazing children and grandchildren, live in the paradise of Hawaii and am so honored to be able to work with the wild dolphins and whales. I love my life … and yet I discovered this part of me that just felt detached from all of these blessings. It felt as though it really was not real … that this was someone else’s life. I couldn’t understand it.
So I went down to the ocean again to discover what was going on. I asked all my spiritual guides to surround me and called upon my Higher Self to assist me to go deep to find the answer.
I could see, in my mind’s eye, these loving beings encircling me and my beautiful HS there in the center. She called upon the part of me that feels disconnected to come forth into the circle.
All of a sudden I saw that aspect of me (let’s call her the Doubter) huddled in the fetal position on the floor. My HS asked her, “What is wrong?”
The Doubter said that she does not want to really believe she/I has all these blessings or that more abundance is coming to her because she was afraid she could just lose it all or not receive more blessings. She did not want to be dissappointed … again. So many times she has experienced being excited about some wonderful thing coming and then been disappointed! She did not trust.
So my HS said to her, “Can you quantify those feelings in a mathematical or geometric way?” The Doubter then saw a ball of brown substance that was about the size of her head floating next to her. That, she saw, was symbolic for what that fear looked like and how big it was in relationship to her life.
Then my HS said, “Now, quantify what all possibility looks like to you.”
That was the miracle for me for suddenly I saw Light filling up the whole sky and beyond! I could see the difference between holding on to and being in fear and possible disappointment and allowing myself to choose to be in the Light of All Possibility!
Since I am very visual, this was the perfect vehicle for me to really see what The Doubter was doing. My HS said to me then, “So, what do you choose?”
Well, the answer became crystal clear to me. Why would I choose to stay in the fear of disappointment when the possibility of all my dreams loomed so much larger and was a vast expanse of whatever I could dream of? It is my choice!
I could see that even if I were to be disappointed in the future or even if I lost something I cherished, look how relatively small that experience is in comparison to allowing the Light of All Possibility to inform my life.
Being in the doubt and fear is being in the contraction and being in the Light is expansion. By allowing myself to go into the ball of fear I could so feel that contracting energy, and flowing into the expansion felt so freeing and so full of possibility!
When I “got” this, I saw my HS take The Doubter into her arms and she allowed her to be absorbed into my HS. Beautiful!
I think of this every day now and if I find I am slipping into that ball of fear, I immediately choose the beauty, freedom and possibility of the Light!