In the rainforest
July 6, 2021 REBORN!!
I Am
It Is
Amen
If you have been following my journey of inner healing and surrender for the last two years since we lost our house, you will know of the stunning initiation that occurred to me when we were with the humpback whales in Mo’orea last October.
Since my last writing, my dear body has been showing me where very old energy was hidden within … remnants of past traumas from my childhood and past lives that have been stuck in the density of my cells for seventy seven years. Yes, I have gone through many years of therapy and energy healings before being called to Hawaii to work with the dolphins way back in 1994. And this sacred time has allowed my soul to bring forth the deep core entrenched energies to be loved and transmuted into Light.
Though I had so much fear of financial security,and other fears too, hidden within, I actually allowed myself to “jump off the cliff” following our guidance to move to Hawaii in 1994. Over the many years, the dolphins and whales helped me to release that fear so deeply. I do feel I am now free of it for the most part, thanks to the cetaceans and to my amazing husband, Doug, who supports me on all levels.
Back in October, while we were facilitating our whale-swim retreat in beautiful Mo’orea, the last Thursday swim (October 8) brought forth the extraordinary initiation that I have written about in my blog (scroll down). At that time, the whales told me (and it was confirmed by my spiritual teacher, David) that I was going to give birth to a new me … I was the Mother and the Child. I was symbolically carrying the new me. I knew the gestation would take nine months.
During the last nine months, I have had delicious time to just be … no work during this time. I gave myself the gift of only focusing on myself for this gestation period. For days on end, I would sit in our yard here in the beautiful rain forest and just allow myself to sit and be with nature. There was nothing I HAD to do! Pele held my feet to the fire supporting my clearings. Surrounded by the sacred Ohia trees and giant ferns in the peaceful surroundings here has allowed my process of deeper healing to unfold and my body to finally let go of ancient negative energy from this life and other lifetimes too.
I have so loved this quiet time, even though I had pains in my body and emotional clearings off and on all along the way. My body showed me through the pain that, despite years and years of healing, I had not completely unearthed and been conscious of remnants of past trauma from my childhood that were still stuck.
We had to go through all of our things that have been in paid storage since July of 2019 and clear out even more. This allowed me to find treasures of awakening that I had written about in my journals, and memories began to flourish.
As the months rolled on, different memories from the dysfunction came into my awareness to be felt, cried out and loved, which led to many times of forgiveness and clearing. I was aware enough to allow the feelings and not to do spiritual bypassing. My amazing husband, Doug, would stop what he was doing and just hold me as I cried and shook until the psychic pain passed once again.
July 1, as I was nearing the ninth month date of my spiritual gestation time, I was guided to do a seven day silent retreat. This was perfect for me as I could really look over the last nine months and understand it all. I did a few meditations each day, read excerpts from books that were guided by my Higher Self, wrote in my journal and allowed myself to just be with the silence.
On July 6, I had the very strong feeling that this was to be my new birth-day. As I made my way to my favorite spot in our backyard up on the little hill to find the perfect spot to sit, I heard, “This is like your third dimensional birth (I was born on Easter) … like Easter and being re-born into the Light.”
Earlier that day I had finished my journaling and delving into various etheric ceremonies guided by my Higher Self (HS). I did feel complete and ready for birth. The following is what happened for my new birth.
SACRED RE-BIRTHING
I sat in my beach chair facing the sky full of deep blue and billowing white clouds and gazed at the tall trees that were sparkling in the sun after the earlier rain. It was beautiful and silent except for the songs of the birds … perfection.
I was listening to whale music and song when, in my mind’s eye, I suddenly saw six ancient Hawaiian kahunas standing next to me, three on each side. It was so very real for me as I felt their pure hearts and their nurturing care for my process. They told me they were there to support the birth as they knelt beside me.
In feeling into the beautiful and pure energy of these ancient souls, I was a bit surprised that they were all male. I very much was in awe that this was the case.
At my feet was Goddess Pele holding the feminine energy. Gratefully, she has been holding my feet to the Fire of Transformation supporting my clearing all along.
I heard the words, “I am the Mother and the Child.” I had heard these same words right after my initiation with the whales. Hmmm … that was so interesting to me because I could really relate to the mother carrying her precious creation and also feel into being the babe as well.
The Hawaiian elders gently put their hands on me, the fetus (which was a Light Being), and positioned my head at the head of the birth canal, ready for the birth. All during this time, I was aware of being both the mother and the baby at the same time.
As the mother, when the birthing process began, each time I had a contraction, my HS would put before me one of the memories of my grieving that had come up in the last nine months. My emotional wounds came up at each contraction with tears flowing once again, one after the other.
In between contractions, I felt into my “mother’s body” and knew that if this birth was to go smoothly and even be painless, my body had to completely relax and let go. Wow, I was literally exhaling and surrendering just like in real birthing mode!
I kept hearing the words, “Relax the cells and tissues of your body and do not be afraid to soften, open and allow.” As this went on, the contractions began to lessen and my body began to allow the process, as I knew one cannot stop a birth! It was time to let go of all the past nine months of clearing and know that this was the time I was waiting for.
In order to birth the new me, I had dedicated myself to the nine month process. By allowing my emotions to just flow unencumbered without judging myself as being weak or “unawake” all this time, I had to stay awake and conscious during the times of clearing and the times of great joy too. I have so loved the quiet, and am grateful for this perfect place to live to support the whole process.
Finally, after all the contractions were finished, I could feel the final complete surrender and the new me (the Light Being baby) slipped easily and painlessly out of the birth canal and into life! I was born into the Light of All Possibility, out of the Matrix, as the whales had told me would happen! Archangel Michael cut the umbilical cord and I was free!
Now, as the new babe (cleansed and cleared of the past), I could feel myself floating in the Light and could see Source as projecting my soul, like a ray of Light, from its core into the specific ray which is my own soul. In this symbolic picture, since I am very visual, it was so powerful to see my soul then pierce third dimension earth becoming human.
What feels truth to me is that, after this sacred re-birth, I have the opportunity to consciously bring this Light Being baby’s energy into my human body and embody the innocence and purity of who I really am as an extension of God (AS WE ALL ARE, I BELIEVE.)
After experiencing my own souls’s journey, I could then see the billions and billions of other souls being expressed from The One as radiant beams of Light. My HS showed me that billions of those souls would choose to incarnate in third dimension earth too. At that point, seeing that we are all truly the same energy as God or Source, I could see that all humans are in this third dimensional experience, uniquely different from each other, and that we are all doing the best we can to navigate this density, no matter our intrinsic makeup.
I felt an overwhelming sense of acceptance of all this is. When viewed from the Light of All Possibility, and knowing that we all have been “dark” and “light” in many incarnations, how could I judge anyone for their experience? There grew a sense of peace unfolding within me … and trust that everything really does happen for a reason and that all is in perfect divine order. A deep compassion descended upon me and I know I have been changed forever.
When I can truly be one with my consciousness in the Light of All Possibility, apart and away from the “Old Matrix” (earth and third dimension), I feel I can see Truth so much more clearly. And Truth to me means that we are all expressions of The One, God, Source, Consciousness or whatever one chooses to call it. We travel the Light Beam that WE ARE through many lives and dimensions to learn who we truly are. Our experiences teach us and we forge ahead to our destiny becoming one with God once again … and then the whole journey goes on and on into infinity.
I am so grateful to the powerful whales, my Higher Self and my spiritual guides, the Hawaiian elders, Pele, my dear friends and especially to my loving husband, Doug, for the unending support for me on this profound journey.
What will come out of this I do not know … and I am living one moment at a time basking in the wonder of the new me! Woooo Hoooooo!